Thursday April 6, 2017

 

The world is full of hurt people. I have not met a single person who has not been hurt or wronged by someone and that goes for me too. The interesting phenomenon is that everyone feels wronged or hurt but few people ever see themselves as the offender. If we were to compare the number of people who feel as though they have been wronged or hurt to the number of people who feel they have wronged or hurt someone, that would amount to roughly three or four people in the world offending everyone. Obviously this is not the case. The truth is that we have all been wronged and hurt by someone and we also have wronged or hurt someone. We are all guilty of hurting and offending others therefore we should practice asking for forgiveness.

 

How to ask for forgiveness:

 

1. Make a list of the people you have harmed and what you did to them.

 

Here are a few questions that will help you make your list: Have I lied or deceived anyone? Have I been verbally, physically, or emotionally abusive to anyone? Have I been unfaithful to anyone? Do I owe a debt to anyone?

 

Once you have made your list the next thing to do is to ask those persons to forgive you. However, you must do this in a way that you avoid as much as possible causing collateral damage. Jesus put it this way, “Do unto others as you would like them to do to you”.

 

When you ask for forgiveness:

 

• Do it at the right time.

 

There is a right time and a right way to do everything… Ecclesiastes 8:6 TEV

 

Someone once said that timing is everything. You want to get to it as soon as possible but there is a right and wrong time.

 

• Do it with the right attitude.

 

You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave.  – Philippians 2:5-7 NLT

 

If Jesus who wronged no one acted humbly, how much more should we not show humility when asking the people we have wronged or hurt to forgive us?

 

• Do it without expectations.

 

Do not expect anything in return from the person you are asking to forgive you. They may accept your apology and they may even extend an apology, but at the end of the day, whether they do or not this is about doing the right thing the right way.

 

• Do it in an appropriate way.

 

Speak the truth in love. – Ephesians 4:15 NLT

 

Think before you speak and think about what you say and how you say it. If your apology is going to cause more harm than good, it might not be the appropriate time. If this is the case, see a minister or a counselor and confess your offense to them.

 

Thoughtless words can wound as deeply as any sword, but wisely spoken words can heal.

– Proverbs 12:18 TEV